"Thank You, Lord, that in my distress I can call on You. And when I cry out to You, Lord, You hear my voice and answer (Psalm 18:6). May the joy of knowing You fill my heart with happiness and peace." (from Power of a Praying Woman)
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I feel normal. So normal, it feels strange, if that makes any sense. I'm not in a downward spiral nor am I on an upswing. I feel happiness and peace. Not everything is hunky dory. In fact, my outward circumstances have not changed at all. It's all an inner working in my heart. A gift from God. It's mind boggling to me. Just a few weeks ago I was despairing of EVER being back to normal. I am reveling in it. And I praise God for pulling me through it, making me wiser, more compassionate and better able to help and encourage others because of what I have endured.
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I am grateful:
1) for surviving my busiest day of the week yesterday.
2) for Jack in the Box for breakfast
3) that I worked out again this morning (good thing, too, considering #2)
4) that I have women's bible study tonight
5) I actually have money enough after paying bills that the kids and I can go see Toy Story 1 & 2 in 3D over the weekend.
Diane, isn't finding serenity wonderful!! Serenity for me is accepting life isn't always sunshine and lollipops and being happy with that because we trust God. We do the footwork the best we can and leave the rest up to God, sometimes the outcome isn't the way we want it to be but after a time we learn that the outcome is the way it is suppose to be in the greater scheme of life. I am a Buddhist in recovery and part of my spiritual path is learning to walk on the middle path, which means never being to high or too low, that true happiness is found in living in the moment at hand. When I was active in my addiction I was always worrying about something past, present or future, steps 3,10, 11 and 12 have freed me from this bondage for the most part, I still have my daze but they don't last as long as they use to, thanks to the God of my understand.
ReplyDeleteThis is a really great post and your happiness and graditude is shining through every word!!
Peace in the Fellowship of recovery
Scott
I am so happy for you. You sound like you are in a GREAT place! Enjoy Toy Story 1 & 2 this weekend. I am thinking of taking my kids as well.
ReplyDeletethat is wonderful! such an answer to prayer! normal is a good thing to feel :)
ReplyDeleteneat that you/kids can go and see Toy Story 1/2 this weekend too! The Lord is awesome in his provisions :)
betty
I "get it"! Why does normal have to feel so wierd? I still get serenity and boredom confused. I'm still in CT, but I'm babysitting and the kids are asleep...so I finally get a chance to do some catching up here. I'm so glad you're back Diane...we miss you when you're gone.
ReplyDeleteI thank God along with you for normalcy returning to your being! It is Him, and Him alone. Thank you for sharing this encouraging message. Blessings...
ReplyDeleteI'm happy for normal. I find that when I'm normal though I tend to become elated and maybe throw in an expectation or two. That brings me right back to reality fast.
ReplyDeleteGlad that things are going well for you.
The blessing of feeling normal is all the more sweet after emerging from the dark hole of not normal.
ReplyDeletePeace. I have sign to remind me. It's such a precious thing....
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